Private Life (2018)

Private Life, written and directed by Tamara Jenkins, comes in at number 96 on the Guardian’s the 100 best films of the 21st century. When I first tuned into this film I wasn’t sure if I was willing to watch 2 hours of a couple struggling with fertility. But, Private Life quickly introduced a cast of characters who would bring colour to this downer of a story.

Speaking of colour, the film is shot in muted colours, which makes all of the characters look very strung out. This was appropriate as we watched our leads, Richard and Rachel be weighed down by their struggle to conceive.

The muted colours of this film, along with the thick knit cardigans and the heavy jackets, reminded me of the most comforting season, autumn. Most of the action takes place in a lived-in apartment full of books, and inside restaurants and cafes. This made the story feel familiar, it drags you in, all the better to make you feel the unease of our main couple. They struggle through IVF treatment, meeting with a social worker, and awkwardly interacting with young birthmothers and egg donors. If I were to sum up this film in one word it would be-desperation.

The cast of veteran actors, including Paul Giamatti as Richard and Kathryn Hahn as Rachel, is a no brainer for such a delicate topic. These actors bring humour as well as nuance to these roles, which made this film delightful to watch.

For whatever reason, the introduction of Richard and Rachel’s young ‘step’ niece, Sadie, kept me engaged in the story. Perhaps it’s easier for me to relate to a younger female character than our leads who are attempting to get pregnant later in life. Sadie also adds conflict to this tired couple’s story. Sadie often unwittingly puts her foot in her mouth by pointing out that Richard and Rachel, despite their artistic success, are just getting by financially. Often, her attempts to relate to the couple are
obnoxious or overly familiar.

Sadie comes to stay with them following some difficulty attending her college classes. She attempts to bond with them over their mutual love of writing. Sadie is enrolled in a writing program, and Rachel and Richard are authors and playwrights. Richard and Rachel are tackling the challenge to become parents at every angle and are simultaneously trying to get an egg donor while attempting to adopt. Sadie begins to look like a suitable candidate for an egg donor, which becomes the core focus of the story as it unfolds.

This film is marketed as a comedy but I wouldn’t say it’s laugh out loud funny. The humour often lies in a comforting mirroring throughout the film. We see quirks repeated, playing on the nature of habit. The anaesthetist tells the same story to Rachel as he later does to Sadie as she goes under, that his daughter says he has the most ‘boring job in the world, putting people to sleep.’ This hints at a rich fabric that goes beyond our core characters. You can imagine that this anaesthetist tells the same anecdote to every patient before they become unconscious. The fertility jokes are also quick fire throughout this script, especially from Kathryn Hahn’s Rachel.

I can see now that the Guardian’s film list will be quite a slog for me as the tragic is favoured over the lighthearted, but isn’t that always the way? There is a real skill to pulling off a comedy, especially about such a depressing topic. But often, in critical circles at least, comedy is sidelined in favour of dramas. Following Margaret, Private Life was a rewarding breath of fresh air. It helps that this film is conveniently on Netflix. I would definitely recommend this film.